author: FireCracker KLee624820@a...
(Italic copy bordered by_underscore_)
Archive? You'd better.

A/U

House of Vegeta: Celipe's Rage pt.6

For the first time in his life, Bardock felt something akin to panic
as he left the palace with Kakarot in tow. Servants snickered and
glanced away as he passed through.

_Berdakte. Stupid fools..._

"My, my! Another surprise, Bardock?"

The commander turned at a brutish voice. Nappa and his cronies,
Oburon and Jekk stood in a nearby conference area.

Bardock glared at them. "I don't have time-"

"Now that's no way to be, Bardock" Oburon smirked, glancing down at
Kakarot as they approached. "Seems like you've accquired a
chibi...join us in the winery by the barracks and we'll celebrate,
hn?"

Bardock flushed. "I'm afraid not, I have to get home. Kakarot needs
to be fed."

The officers looked at each other briefly. "Kakarot?"

"Yes. Now if you'll excuse me-"

Jekk clapped a broad hand on Bardock's shoulder. "Come now, isn't a
new baby cause for good spirits?" the thin lips stretched in a cold
smile.

Nappa lifted an eyebrow. "Interesting, this is so sudden...I don't
remember you ever mentioning Celipe being pregnant."

Kakarot hissed, his tail a ball of fur.

Bardock faltered. "I...it may have been an oversight."

Jekk chuckled, scratching his shaggy head. "A new baby an oversight?
What is this, Bardock?"

Oburon's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Hai, you're as jumpy as a
gardii with a hotfoot. Why are you so nervous?"

Bardock hefted Kakarot over a shoulder. "Who says I'm nervous? I
merely have things to do, Oburon."

"That seems clear" Jekk snickered, watching Kakarot squirm and swing
chunky arms. "That chibi is a wild one."

A pause. The baby made an eerie rattling sound that rolled into a
high pitched growl.

"I don't believe he likes us" Oburon jabbed at Nappa. The bald
general grinned smugly.

"Hai, Bardock seems in a hurry to hide his new baby."

Bardock glared at them. "Stop wasting my time with this, already!
This is my cousin's baby, and I'm already late getting Kakarot out of
here. Now stand aside!"

Nappa pulled his chin, lifting an eyebrow."First you forget to tell
us your wife is expecting, and now it's your cousin's baby?"

Oburon nearly laughed out loud. "Hai, commanders always bring their
cousins into the palace. Do we look like idiots, Bardock?!"

"Maybe" Bardock snapped. "I never said Celipe was pregnant, anyway!"

"Hn, denying that chibi is useless, Bardock. If you stood here and
spat him out he couldn't resemble you more" Nappa pointed.

Bardock spun on his heel. "I'll see you all at the next conference."

"Bardock!!" Nappa bellowed. The commander slowly turned, glaring
coldly.

"What!!"

"I'm still your superior officer. You know the code. If there's been
an indiscretion, we need to know."

Kakarot abruptly howled and spat, kicking thick little legs wildly.
The officers stared in amazement.

"Hn, that daza (demon) has a set of teeth on him, ne?" Oburon walked
up and poked a finger at Kakarot.

"I wouldn't do that-" Bardock warned him.

"Yasse Ki nama, chibi?" (Am I scary, little one?) the thickset
commander teased, waving his finger around at the baby.

A spitting snarl was his only reply. Oburon glanced at Nappa and
Jekk. "Maybe we should train this one ourselves, eh?"

Jekk stared, pointed. "Oburon, turn around!!"

"AIIIEEEE!!!"

Tiny jaws clamped down over his pinky, crunching the knuckle joint.
Oburon screeched and yanked his hand away, ripping a nail completely
off as his torn finger bled everywhere.

"Little bastard!! Are you trying to amputate me?!" he ripped off his
sash and wrapped his wounded hand in it.

"Bardock, take that rabid brat out of here!!"

Kakarot licked his lips, purring softly.

"Gladly" Bardock grinned, turning away. "And thanks for letting
Kakarot get a snack. He's a bit young for blood, but I suppose a
little won't hurt."

Nappa grunted at his wounded friend. "This won't pass, Bardock. The
child looks like an ovee (bastard royal) to me."

"Think what you want, Nappa. The same was said of me also" he turned
briefly to Oburon.

"I suggest you get that reattached, or you're going to lose it."

****

Despite being away for a month, Bardock didn't relish the idea of
going home. Not with a baby, anyway. He sighed, looking at the half
asleep chibi on the back seat of the helipod.

_And how the hell am I going to explain this to Raditz?_

He hovered across the yard and landed on the flight pad. Kakarot
snored lightly, curled up in a ball in his high seat.

Bardock spared himself a smile. _Kami, I have to find a way for this
one, no matter what Celipe does._

"Abrende. Cehe di, Kakarot." (Wake up. See your new home, Kakarot).

The infant blinked as Bardock pulled him from the back seat. Tiny
lips stretched in a yawn.

Bardock stroked the thick little mop, purring. "Sleepyhead. Time to
meet your new family."

He'd barely gotten from the helipod when he noticed neighbors staring
in curiosity. A curse curled his lips.

_Damn...it's those nosey ass sisters next door._

"Yo, Bardock...what's that in your arms?"

He snorted. "What's it look like, Berda?"

"Ooh" the other saiyan crooned, peeping at Kakarot. "Why Bardock, you
dog...we never knew you had a new addition to your family!"

"Well, now you do" he turned to go. The other sister jumped in front
of him.

"What a pretty chibi..." Iva smiled at Kakarot. Bardock flushed, his
eyes darting about.

"Thank you, but I really have to get inside-"

"What's his name?"

"Kakarot."

"Nekami ta, Kakarot" Berda cooed at the baby, tapping his nose with
her finger.

"Don't do that!!"

"What the fug's your problem, Bardock?" Iva glared at him, her full
lips in a pout.

"Nani?" he stared in amazement. Kakarot merely clucked, suckling the
woman's finger softly.

"Shimatta!" Bardock couldn't believe his eyes.

"Oh, he's a sweetie" Berda flicked her jagged bangs. Kakarot stuck
his tongue out, grinning.

"I see where he gets his looks from" Iva winked.

"Thanks for the compliments, but I need to get him inside-"

"Ha, what's this now?" A thickset saiyan in flashy dress armor walked
up.

Bardock winced. _Great..all I need is Perun to start talking, the
gasbag..._

"Bardock, what the hell...I don't remember Celipe being pregnant!" he
blurted out loud. Iva and Berda threw knowing glances, grinning. In
lower class neighborhoods there were no secrets.

Kakarot's tail puffed at his voice. Perun chortled, eyeing the chibi.

"A new little one, eh?"

Bardock glanced quickly at the front door. "Hai, now I've got to get
going..."

Perun squeezed a small foot. "Hn, he's a solid one! Excellent points,
I'd say."

Saiyans always inspected their babies for coloring, tail kinks,
and 'points' (formation and sharpness of nails). Bardock sighed,
anticipating Celipe's reaction.

"Everyone, listen. I don't want to be rude, but Kakarot needs to be
fed!"

"Oh alright, Bardock, don't go into labor" Iva rolled her eyes,
grabbing her sister.

"C'mon, Berda" she winked. Berda gave her an 'oh, I get it' look and
snickered.

"Sure, whatever. See you at the block picnic, Bardock" the two
sisters went down the walkway.

"Who's he kidding?" Berda whispered to her sister. "That ain't
Celipe's baby...boy, is his ass gonna get torn up for this!"

"Ya gotta admit, it takes balls to bring your _besdi_ (bastard) home
to the wife!"

Berda nodded, glancing back. "C'mon...we got some phone calls to
make!"

****

Perun chuckled, watching the sisters leave. "Nothing worse than
blaktu that tell everyone's buisness, eh?"

"Yeah, right. Now if you'll excuse me-" Bardock turned once more to
go.

"I'll stop by and congradulate the new mother!" the heavy saiyan
mocked.

_Fat bastard_ "That won't be necessary!!"

Perun smiled, seeing Bardock pale. "Hn, I see. Good health then, boy.
You'll need it!!"

With a sick cackle he waved and walked off. Bardock snarled in his
direction.

"Shiksha ghetto dirt. I hate this neighborhood."

Kakarot agreed, champing sharp little teeth and kicking. Bardock
nuzzled the chibi, kissing the small face tenderly.

"My Kakarot. Ibeni (into the breach), chibi" he opened the front door.

****

Celipe was downstairs watching a movie when a strange scent wafted
across her nose. A scent that immediately made her hackles rise.

Slanted eyes blinked in astonishment as she sniffed. "What? A baby?!"

Shapely curves bounded up the stairs. "Bardock!!"

The handsome saiyan froze in the kitchen. _Shimatta! The woman can
smell a mile away!_

Celipe strode into the kitchen, her red robe streaming behind
her. "What's going on...here?" she stared at Kakarot.

Bardock swallowed, seeing her expression _Shit!_

Celipe blinked, taking in the situation. Sharp fangs sparkled in a
sensuous mouth.

"Celipe...let me explain..."

She stalked past him, reaching for a meat cleaver hanging by the
pantry door.

"Woman, are you crazy?!"

He moved just in time as the cleaver sailed past his shoulder and
embedded in the opposite wall.

"Bakayarou! You dare bring that besdi to my face? I'll kill you!!"
she moved to strike him.

A rasping hiss stopped her momentarily. Kakarot resumed his antics,
spitting and yowling.

"Explain this, Bardock!!" she growled, fists clenched.

Bardock freed an arm just in case. "Listen to me, Celipe...our King
wants us to take in the child-"

"What the hell does this look like, a home for lost infants?!" she
bellowed. "You must really think I'm a fool...our Ou has nothing to
do with this!"

Bardock felt a flash of anger. "Not true. He commanded-"

"Budakki!" Celipe pointed at Kakarot. "This is a mistake you made
with some big assed lakefront girl!!"

"Like hell-"

"Any more besdis out there, Bardock?" she nearly pushed against him.
He growled at her.

"You didn't exactly want children yourself-"

A stream of curses flowed from her. "We both had priorites. You
expected me to raise brats while you roamed for months at a time?
Fool!"

"You took in Raditz-"

"That's another thing. What the fug are you going to tell the boy?
That you make babies away from home and bring them here?!"

Bardock flushed scarlet. Small footsteps padded into the kitchen.

"Why are you all yelling?" a saiyan child with masses of hair entered
with a look of confusion.

Bardock sighed. "Raditz, there's something I need to talk to you
about-" he paused, seeing his other son stare at the baby. Thick
brows pinched in a frown.

"Father...what...is...that's my brother?"

A weary sigh. "Hai, boy.."

Raditz glared. "Why!!"

"I'll tell you later. Take him" Bardock handed over the chibi. Raditz
sniffed.

"What am I supposed to do with him?"

"Take him downstairs until I finish with your mother here!!" he
snapped.

"That won't be long, either!" Celipe retorted. Bardock glared at
her. "Go on, Raditz. I'll explain everything later."

The boy rolled his eyes in disdain before leaving. Bardock paused,
watching him go.

"You think he'll respect you after this?!" Celipe wanted to know.

Bardock turned on her once more. "It doesn't matter, the chibi
exists. In time he'll feel differently."

"Well I won't. So does the little mistake have a name?"

He got in her face. "Kakarot. And he's no mistake!"

"Looks like one to me" she snarled right back. "He acts like he's got
brain rot...but that isn't surprising, considering what his mother
probably is."

"Woman-"

"Hn, the river trash have big asses and weak genes...father told me
not to marry you, but I didn't listen."

"What the hell...again with that, woman? If you want a divorce so
badly I'll gladly grant you one!"

"Father nearly checked your background, you know, but I stopped him.
He just assumed you were first class, perhaps elite. But you've lied
about a lot of things for years, haven't you?"

Bardock dropped in a chair. "I don't deny my culpability, Celipe. But
surely you wouldn't take out your anger on an innocent child."

"Your child, not mine! I accepted your story about Raditz when you
brought him here, but I won't accept this! My pride is at stake!"

"Oh? And pride made you sleep with Toma?!"

She started at that. "Wha-"

Bardock laughed bitterly. "Now who thinks who's a fool?"

Celipe stuttered. "That hardly matters-"

"Woman, I have friends in the barracks...we watch our own."

"Shikshei asshole. At least I didn't bring any babies home!"

Dark eyes burned with fury on her. "You nearly did. I found out about
the miscarriage."

Celipe went white. "When? How?!"

"Like I told you, I have friends" he smiled coldly. "How long ago was
that? Four, maybe five years ago?"

Celipe glared, too angry to care anymore. "And if it was? You can't
do anything about it, Bardock!"

"I already have."

"Liar! Toma went to Abegon with a team of raiders."

Bardock shrugged, smirked. "A pity about his accident."

Celipe stood back. "What? Toma died in a brawl with his crew on ship."

Bardock smiled sharply at her. Celipe's eyes went wide.

"No...you didn't...it was a HIT?!!" she lunged for the meat cleaver
again. Bardock stopped her motion just in time.

"Listen to me" he hissed. "Neither of us is innocent...we've both
hurt each other enough. All I ask is that you give Kakarot a chance.
He has...special qualities."

"What qualities?" she snarled. "If you ask me, he has the udware
madness!"

"Use your eyes and think, Celipe! Look at his formation, his
coloring! Does he seem like a renegade trash chibi?"

She stared into eyes once loved. "No...he's formed like an elite. So
who's the mother, a courtisan or-"

"I can't tell you."

"Then take him the hell out of here!" she nearly spat in his face.

Bardock released her, thinking furiously. _I have no
choice._ "Listen, Celipe. He has super saiyan potential."

She thought that over. "He...what?!"

"If you accept him as your son, think of the status you would gain."

Celipe paced, considering it. "The mother of a super saiyan..."

"Hai, and no one would know."

She glared at her husband suspiciously. "If that's true, why doesn't
his own mother raise him?"

"The family is concerned about scandal."

Celipe stabbed a piece of fruit with a knife. "All right, Bardock.
I'll go along with this for now. Maybe I'll get a chance to see the
bitch you're bouncing with."

He growled at her. "Tell it to Toma, if you find his bones."

She snorted. "Telling Raditz is your job. I'm sure you'll lie well."


THE END


Next: House of Vegeta: The Queen's Ultimatum pt. 7